Don’t be bashful! Ever since the Game Boy surfaced and took the world by storm, gamers everywhere have taken to the bathrooms with the portable gaming device in hand. Now, with the rampant success of the DS Lite and the “Touch Generation” games, a new generation of bathroom gaming has begun! Unfortunately, this new generation of bathroom gaming has been quite a daunting one with all the great games to choose from.

Fear not, young bathroom gamer, because we have the perfect list for you! From the aspiring bathroom gamer to even the most seasoned of pros, everybody is sure to walk away from this list with quite a few good nuggets of information- after the jump, of course.

10. Yosh’s Island DS

This is currently my (Becky’s) restroom game of choice. Any type of game that is played in stages is perfect for small bits of gaming I can easily sit down, play through one (or two during those rough days) stages and be done for the day. There isn’t a story line that gets broken up or the problem of waiting for save points to crop up- making this an almost perfect portable game.

And who can forget that this game is also just another terrible bathroom metaphor in the making. Take the box art sample to the right that features the four main stages of “the cycle”: The Struggle, Surprise, Relief, and finally, Pride.

9. Mario Kart DS

Perhaps an even better choice than Yoshi’s Island, Mario Kart is playable for the duration of any trip to the john. Think you’ll be done in a flash? No problem, just pop in Mario Kart and complete any of the quick racing challenges! Or perhaps you’re anticipating a more lengthy visit any of the Grand Prix races will suffice your entertainment needs for the entire time! Be wary of starting any Wi-Fi matches, though not being able to pause the game when you need to can be rather daunting.

8. Nintendogs

Now this is a soothing game to play when you’re having a little trouble! One doesn’t even have to think when you’re playing any edition of Nintendogs–just switch it on and watch your lovable puppies yip and roll around. If you’re feeling a little more active, try taking your dog out for a relaxing walk (and don’t forget to pick up after they do their own business!) or play a game of frisbee in the park. Whatever the case, no game makes taking a trip to the bathroom more enjoyable than Nintendogs!

7. Elite Beat Agents

Elite Beat Agents is, without a doubt, the most difficult game to play while in the bathroom. This game require some intense focusing at times when it might be a bit hard to focus on a game. Not only that, but the game’s “music” isn’t always the most soothing soundtrack for your post Taco Bell escapades. Trust me, being forced to listen to Avril Lavigne and Hoobastank during your time of peril does far more harm than good.

6. WarioWare Inc: Mega Micro Game$

You all know that one guy that goes to the bathroom, but before the door even has time to shut, the toilet flushes and he’s already done doing his civic duties. Usually I would be jealous of this sort of superhuman biological function, but he’s the one missing out on some quality gaming time. No worries though, because WarioWare is absolutely perfect for even the fastest of pit stops. Done in less than 30 seconds? No problem! That’s enough time for at least 5 quality microgames.

Toss in Dr. Crygor’s bathroom themed stage after his latest run of gastrointestinal distress, and you have yourself quite the bathroom companion.

5. Tetris DS

Some people do crosswords, others play Sudoku, but Tetris is clearly the best bathroom puzzler available! The variety of play modes gives even the pickiest of bathroom gaming aficionado plenty of options to entertain them. Need to brush up on some puzzle solving skills? No problem, the puzzle mode (duh!) is sure to keep you challenged far into the night.

Gamers tired of all this new age mumbo jumbo can kick it old school with everybody’s favorite standard mode. The low difficulty and familiarity of this mode allows you to just sit down, zone out, and watch the little blocks drop!

Tetris DS even offers the… push mode. The competitive types should proceed with caution though, since losing a round in push mode could have some disastrous effects aside from the standard spikes and flames found in the game…

4. Animal Crossing: Wild World

You’re already doing something productive during that stint in the bathroom, so why not make it even more so? In just one trip you can pull some weeds, catch some bugs, shake some trees, check the recycling bin, water flowers, dig some holes, buy some furniture, check the bulletin board, mingle with neighbors, build a snowman, and…well you get the point!

Productivity at its very finest.

3. Brain Age

Performing virtual chores is good and all, but why not make your quality time all the more valuable by giving your brain a hearty workout. In fact, Professor Kawashima’s daily Brain Age calculation test is the perfect way to spend those few precious minutes. From word memorization, head count, calculations X 100, and my favorite, low to high, these brain exercises are sure to give you the ultimate sense of accomplishment in the end.

Just watch out for that dreaded Stroop test while in mixed company. You might get a few looks when you come out after spending the last three minutes shouting “BLUE! YELLOW! BLA-RED!”

2. Pokémon Diamond and Pearl

Never before have I (Matthew) been so addicted to “catching ‘em all!” While I tend to hardly find enough time to play most games (darn college!), I have been catching myself making my rounds across the Sinnoh region a bit too many times throughout my day, especially while in the bathroom. The game’s extremely slow pace (pointless trainer battles, anyone?) has turned my quick pitstops into hour long Pokécraps. But hey, it’s all worth it for those few amazing moments- such as when my Magikarp finally evolved into a Gyarados. It’s those bathroom moments that make life truly worth living.

And I, Beeks, couldn’t put it any better myself! I tend to find the game’s use of the internal clock to be quite strategic–like, say, during those late night poos. Any other time I’d be too groggy to even care about flipping open a magazine on the pot, let alone turning on my DS Lite when I’m still feeling a bit fuzzy at 3 in the morning. But I’ll tell you this, there is no better time to go about catching some of those rare Pokemon that only come out during the wee hours of the morning!

1. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

This game is mediocre.

OBJECTION!

This game is good.

HOLD IT!

Ok, fine, this game is the best bathroom game ever made. Seriously, nothing beats the satisfaction of solving an entire murder trial within the comfort of your own bathroom. Nothing. Bonus points for shouting “OBJECTION!” and “HOLD IT!” into the mic while people are over. Trust me, people will never be more intrigued about a bathroom trip once you come out of there, especially when you tell them about the murder you just solved!

If you’re still reading this, then you’ve obviously got some merit–while some might run for the hills when the topic of poo surfaces, you, the reader, have made it to the end because you either A) already participate in bathroom gaming and want to brush up on the titles of choice, or B) you’ve never considered playing on the pot and find this to be a remarkable idea! In closing, both Matthew and I would like you to heed this one warning: be sure to avoid Final Fantasy III. A game that’s only for the hardcore RPG fan is now only for the hardcore bathroom gamer. With save points scattered far and wide, you could find yourself trapped in the bathroom for hours before finding a stopping point! I only recommend this game if you’re prepping for a colonoscopy! But I digress. We hope you enjoyed our Top Toilet Titles and wish you a happy gaming session the next time you’re ready to take a dump!

Join us next week as we take a look at the top games to play while playing a game.

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