Nintendo has decided to surprise us with not 3, but 4 Virtual Console releases this week! Every system gets some sweet retro lovin’ this week, except for the N64 (of course). Donkey Kong Country is by far this week’s blockbuster release, but what about the other 3?!?!?

Donkey Kong Country

Anybody around the gaming world in 1994/1995 remembers the enormous amount of hype surrounding this game. For those few unacquainted souls, Donkey Kong Country was one of the very first console games to use pre-rendered 3-D graphics, which made the entire world “ooh” and “ahh” at Donkey and Diddy Kong collecting their bananas…

Luckily for Kong and company, the graphics are definitely not the main attraction 13 years later, since the game is actually pretty fun. Donkey Kong Country is your typical 90s platformer that probably would have never wowed gamers had it not been for it’s massive hype train for the graphics. The game is pretty straightforward: collect bananas, launch from barrels, ride in rail cars, straddle rhinos, and switch between Donkey and Diddy Kong at anytime. While Donkey Kong Country is certainly an overrated game in hindsight, it still provides for an entertaining experience that will keep you collecting those bananas for at least a weekend, or two.

Final Opinion: Yay

New Adventure Island

Everybody bow down, because Master Higgins has arrived for his first, and hopefully not last, Virtual Console release.

Our first glimpse of the series on the Virtual Console comes in the form of TurboGrafx-16’s New Adventure Island. Aside from Super Adventure Island II, the entire series is basically just an updated form of the same game with just a few added bells (sorry, no whistles). Regardless, I adore the Adventure Island series in all it’s skateboarding, axe-tossing, and dino-riding glory.

While the Adventure Island series doesn’t hold a torch to Mario or Sonic, the game provides an entirely different experience than most platformers, which is most likely due to the skateboarding portions. One moment you are walking around, tossing axes at strange prehistoric creatures, then BAM, you are speeding along on a skateboard (while tossing axes of course). Watch out though, because the skateboard makes the game move pretty fast…so don’t skate into a flame or anything like that. Also, don’t forget to jump and collect random food items from the air. Adventure Island gives you a lifebar that slowly drains through damage and time, so make sure to fill up before Master Higgins bites the prehistoric curb.

I will always question why Nintendo is releasing certain franchises on the TurboGrafx-16 before letting their more well-known counterparts out to play (it’s affirmative action in video game form). Either way, New Adventure Island is definitely an acquired taste for most people, even if I happen to love the series. If you are feeling adventurous (ha. ha.) then you can’t go wrong with this game, although you might want to wait until one of the cheaper NES versions grace the Virtual Console.

Final Opinion: Cautionary Yay

Streets of Rage

When somebody mentions the “beat ‘em up” genre that plagued the early 90s, Streets of Rage is the first title that comes to mind.

I won’t waste our time by trying to explain the gameplay/story (see: every other game of this genre).

While Streets of Rage is one of the better games of this stale genre, this game is bland compared to Streets of Rage 2. Your best bet is to just sit this one out and wait for one of the sequels (or Final Fight) to be released…

…and that’s really all I have to say about this game.

Final Opinion: Nay

The Legend of Kage

Is this a joke?

Nintendo, please spare us the “we are giving you 4 games this week!” if this is your pathetic excuse for an extra “game.”

I feel sorry for the thousands of hours that were wasted by the programmers who ported this game over to the Virtual Console…and the people who will waste their time playing this game, or writing about it.

So Taito, why this? Isn’t there a certain Bubble Bobble game you should start porting over to the Virtual Console? Or at least Rainbow Islands.

Final Opinion: Nay

At first glance, this looked like a pretty awesome week.

However, this week is just like Donkey Kong Country: pretty at first, but the initial polish quickly wears off after a few moments. Oh well, I just hope Nintendo stops allowing awful games to be released on the Virtual Console. As a parting gift, I leave you with an animation from the groundbreaking graphics of Donkey Kong Country.

EDIT: Apparently, it has been brought to my attention that I have no knowledge as to how Virtual Console games are produced.

“VC games aren’t ported to the VC. The Wii has emulation software built into the firmware that emulates the old software just as if it were being played on an NES. If you were to take the VC files and stick them on an NES cart, they should work in most cases.”

Once again, The Legend of Kage is ruining my entire life by making me look like a complete tool. Thanks, jerks.

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